“You complete me.” That’s what Tom said to Renee in the movie, Jerry McGuire and the entire female audience and maybe a man or two wiped a tear from their eyes and exclaimed, “oh, how sweet!” And it is complete Hollywood nonsense. The Bible says in Genesis 1:27 that God made us in His image. Is God incomplete in any way at all?
But I think this sentiment conveys why so many of us struggle with ourselves. We are looking for another human being to complete us and it just will not happen. How can imperfect, cracked vessels complete anybody? We can’t even hold our own water. We will be disappointed, disillusioned, frustrated, angry, confused, sad and ultimately lonely. Not to mention what we are doing to the person we are trying to get to complete us. We are driving them insane with our codependence.
When we look to another person for our happiness we become tied to his or her moods. Her good mood means we are successful, smart and strong men. Her bad or sad mood reflects to us that we are stupid, moronic losers. We are like shifting sand or a boat tossed around in a bad storm. Our moods swing in direct relation to hers. Stop the insanity!
The God of the universe, who created all things, including 300 billion galaxies, with our own galaxy, the Milky Way containing more than 300 billion stars, loves us above all of His other creations. We were His only creation that He created in His image to do great things and He put us in charge of His creation. We were also His only creation that Jesus died for on the Cross. It’s an awesome and yet humbling truth; one that should empower us as men and women. It’s a truth that should set us free from all of the negative self talk that invades our heads and destroys us day to day.
The fact that we are made in His image should remind us to build the foundations of our lives on Him and not another person. As our Creator, only He makes us and completes us. We must seek Him for leadership, strength and security. Our confidence and joy must come from Him. In the same way, we can’t be responsible for someone else’s happiness. We need to just drop that load right now. It’s too heavy for us to carry, but God can carry it and it is to Him that they must turn, also. This doesn’t mean we become self-centered people unconcerned about the welfare of others. The Bible is filled with Scriptures on how we are to treat others and great detail is given on how a husband is to treat his wife, so men, we are not off the hook. As we look to God for our leadership and strength, He will have us serving others, but it will be for His glory, not our own. When God is our source of joy and purpose; when He is our Foundation and Guide; when He is our Strength and Security we will have our roots planted deep in the right soil and strong enough to care for and lead other people and as husbands, we become men worth following.